What are men most afraid of in bed?

1. Fear that your wife will care about the size of her sexual organs

Men's concerns about the size of their sexual organs are as strong as women's concerns about the size of their breasts. It is not surprising that unmarried men worry about the size of their penises because they have no sexual experience, and there are also many married men who worry that their penises are too big or too small. In particular, some newlywed husbands and husbands who have been married for a long time but still cannot satisfy their wives often fear that their wives will care about the size of their penises during sexual intercourse. In fact, the deviation of the length of male penises is just like the height of people, and there are very few cases of truly pathological gigantism and dwarfism. Similarly, pathologically long or short penises are also extremely rare.

It is generally believed that a penis between 7.8 cm and 20 cm after erection is normal. A relatively short or long penis will not affect the sexual harmony of both parties as long as the sexual position is paid attention to during sex. Therefore, during sex, when a sensitive wife notices that her husband is worried about the size of his sexual organ, the correct approach is to tell him that this does not have much impact on your sex life, as long as the husband devotes himself to it, you will feel good. This can greatly enhance the husband's self-confidence.

2. Fear of not knowing when your wife needs more care and stimulation

A husband once said to a doctor: "When we make love, my wife usually caresses her vulva with her own hands; sometimes, I also caress her with my hands, but she pushes my hands away. Does she prefer to be caressed by herself rather than by me?" From the perspective of the difficulty of women to achieve orgasm, it is easier for women to get physical sexual satisfaction through self-stimulation than through their husbands' caressing. However, making love is a matter for both parties. Mutual caressing, mutual stimulation, and completing the whole process of sexual life together are far more perfect than doing it alone. Therefore, a wise wife should give her husband more guidance.

3. Fear of not having a strong enough erection

Men's erectile function is affected by many factors: work pressure, heavy burdens, emotional discord between husband and wife, etc., all of which can cause poor erection of the penis. Even without these influencing factors, men over 30 years old will occasionally have poor erection. Many men will doubt their sexual function, and some will blindly take various aphrodisiacs and kidney tonics to save their "gradually declining" sexual function. In fact, compared with the period of 18-25 years old when men's sexual desire is the strongest, men over 30 years old will feel that their sexual impulse has decreased, but their ability to control sex has increased. Therefore, the wife's attitude is the most important at this time; if the wife speaks to her husband in a suspicious, complaining or mocking tone, it will only make the problem more serious. The best way is to choose a time when your husband is in a good mood, or in the morning when his erectile function is good, and caress his sexual organs. You can also let him stimulate his vagina, so that your husband will no longer worry about his erectile function.

4. Fear of your wife faking an orgasm

In the life of a couple, the sexual response and sexual information of the couple can sense and stimulate each other. The response of one party to sexual pleasure will make the other party feel extremely satisfied. Take the husband for example. When the wife reaches orgasm during sex, he can get stronger sexual stimulation and feel a sense of pride and accomplishment as a man. However, if he knows that the other party's orgasm is just a disguise, it will greatly damage his self-esteem and affect his sexual interest. Perhaps some women think that since their sexual response is so important to their husbands, it is okay to comfort their husbands when they do not want to engage in sexual intercourse or when they are not feeling well. This is just like some researchers believe that a wife faking an orgasm in front of her husband is like her saying polite words in front of guests, but this kind of courtesy is not desirable. If a wife does not reach orgasm during sex, she can explain to her husband: "I'm in a bad mood today" or "I'm too tired today, but having sex and physical contact with you also makes me feel satisfied." If the wife really speaks out, the husband will understand.

5. Fear that your wife won’t get multiple orgasms

From a sexual physiological perspective, when a man reaches a climax in sexual excitement, his characteristic manifestation is ejaculation. Once ejaculation is over, the man enters a sexual refractory period and will no longer respond to any sexual stimulation. The reason why men have a sexual refractory period is that it is a self-protection mechanism in the process of human evolution. During the sexual refractory period, semen accumulates in the male sexual organs, and the tense muscles of the whole body are relaxed to prepare for the next sexual excitement. However, women do not have a sexual refractory period. Some popular science books on sex often say that women have the potential to reach orgasm multiple times in a row. But this is a "potential" rather than a "necessity." Some husbands often complain: "I really want my wife to be able to reach orgasm multiple times in a row, but it often goes against my wishes, and sometimes the two of us are unhappy about it."

In fact, women's reactions after an orgasm vary. Most women need to continue to be tender and caressed to slowly reduce their sexual excitement. This is a kind of "afterplay" process. Some women can get sexual satisfaction again if they are given corresponding and appropriate stimulation after an orgasm, but their sexual excitement is generally lower each time. In addition, some women's sensitive parts of the body, including the skin, enter a super-sensitive state after an orgasm. They only need to hug and whisper to each other and refuse any stimulation. At this time, if they are caressed or stimulated, they will feel uncomfortable and uncomfortable. Therefore, don't be tempted by the theory that women can achieve multiple orgasms in succession. As long as the couple can share happiness and intimacy in sex, a one-time orgasm is enough.

6. Fear that you won’t have sex long enough

There is no standard for the length of time for making love. Men tend to think that the longer the time, the better. They believe that the longer the time, the stronger their sexual function and the higher their sexual skills. At the same time, the longer the time, the more satisfied their wives will be. Therefore, when men compare their sexual abilities with each other, they often brag about how long their sexual intercourse time is.

In fact, there are two misunderstandings that need to be corrected: First, there is a difference between sexual intercourse time and lovemaking time. Lovemaking time refers to the entire process from the foreplay preparation of both parties to the end of sexual intercourse, when both parties complete the afterplay of sexual life through mutual caressing. This process is the lovemaking time, which can last for several minutes or even longer. Some couples say to each other before going out in the morning: "Go home early in the evening", which means "We have sex tonight", so, in a broad sense, the lovemaking time should start in the morning. The sexual intercourse time refers to the time when the male penis is inserted into the vagina until the ejaculation is completed. This time is not as long as most people boast. Statistics from American sex researchers have found that the average American couples have sexual intercourse time between 5 and 9 minutes. Are there any men who can last for several minutes or even more than an hour? Perhaps there are, but it can be said that there are very few. Second, even if a man can last for more than an hour during sexual intercourse, is it really necessary to last for such a long time? Men who ejaculate too quickly are called "premature ejaculation". There are many men who worry about "premature ejaculation", but there seems to be no one who worries about "delayed ejaculation". However, if the male penis twitches in the vagina for more than half an hour, and he does not intentionally control it and does not ejaculate, if this situation continues, it can not only be diagnosed as "delayed ejaculation", but there is even a suspicion of non-ejaculation. In addition, women's sexual satisfaction is not proportional to the length of men's sexual intercourse. Therefore, men should not be superstitious that the longer the sexual intercourse lasts, the better. If you feel that you cannot last until your wife is satisfied, then increase the time of foreplay and afterplay, or add some new elements to sex and try new ways. Sex will also make your wife satisfied.