Why do we need to fall in love? What does it mean to have loved?

When people ask me why I fall in love, I think it is human instinct, the result of hormones. So what is the reason for people to fall in love? Why do people fall in love?

Love itself is a personal practice, using another person to adjust the energy of both parties.

Many people have misunderstood that love is for the happiness of being loved and loving others, so they attach great importance to the existence of the other person.

Yes, this kind of happiness is a result of love and the most desired result. However, this expectation can easily turn into an obsession with possessing the other person, which is why most conflicts in love arise.

Every love process can be unique, because everyone is unique and complicated, with their own past and present, family background and pressure, as well as the good and bad personalities...

Love is originally about experiencing life, seeing one's own limitations, weaknesses and the true face of human nature from the desires that one projects onto the unique other person, learning and growing from them, experiencing the true meaning of life, and learning self-improvement and gratitude from the process of giving.

However, most people think that love is just about finding someone to love deeply, being with him/her, no longer being lonely, and enjoying happiness. Yes, when you and your partner have the mature ability and willingness to love, love can be elevated to the ideal of enjoying happiness. However, too many people cannot see happiness. In the process of getting along, they only care about being picky and demanding, are always dissatisfied, blindly entangled in negative relationships, indulge in addiction and resentment, create misfortune, and sacrifice love.

You have to see through and correct yourself through love, so that you have not loved wrongly.

Many people ask: I like him, he likes me, is this called love? How can we love with confidence and truly love each other?

In fact, there is no standard for love. Feelings alone can be called love, but if they are not deep enough, they can easily waver. Furthermore, even if the feelings are deep enough to be called love, one may not necessarily feel safe and will always be worried about gains and losses.

It turns out that there is a greater love than love, and that is the belief in life.

The love trajectory of ordinary people is investment and sacrifice, which requires time and patience. Transcendental love can transcend time, but it is not within the scope of discussion here because we are not yet able to understand it.

Love is the fruit that will be produced when people have been together for a long time and have learned to understand and give to each other. Before that, it cannot be called love. It is just a process of emotional, sexual, and physical desire adjustment. It can even be said to be something evolved from egocentrism. We use another person to satisfy our own feelings of being accepted, recognized, and flattered.

A deeper love can transcend the level of the self, which is an even farther sky. Ordinary people like us should not aim too high.

In the early stages of love, it is inevitable to make an emotional investment in establishing a relationship, which is not bad, so don't be stingy.

Without giving, we don’t know how to understand a person. When we get along with a stranger, we see an even stranger version of ourselves. Through getting along, we know pain, feel joy, see attachment, grow ourselves, and understand life. Only then does love truly emerge.